Think.

When something taste like ‘nothing’ what is this nothing? You taste this ‘nothing’ when you are not eating anything, or when there is no any distinct taste in your mouth. But is this taste ‘nothing’? I randomly came across this fact and I find it fascinating. This taste that apparently has no taste is actually our own saliva. So technically, it really isnt nothing, but it is it’s own taste. Our taste buds are just so accustomed to it, that it treats it as the ‘neutral’ taste. So next time think about when you are about to say stuff like ‘Man this doesn’t taste like anything.’ or ‘ I can’t taste anything at the moment.’ You are tasting something, your spit.

Alright another thought that I came across today. Winnie the Pooh. So basically it is a ‘pooh’ named Winnie. Alright so what is this pooh that has a name named after it? I understand taht Winnie the Pooh is a stuffed bear, but really? Pooh? Where did it come from? I was in complete shock over this up until someone explained it to me. His name is Winnie the Pooh, that is it’s whole name. Pooh is just part of his name. Alright, now that brings me to the next question, who in the world would name something with the word ‘the’ in it? Yes I understand, an example would be Alexander the Great, but that is only his nickname, a name he is known for, he had an actual legit name before that. But what about pooh? If Winnie the Pooh is actually the actual name of the yellow honey bear, how does that name make sense?

Fly away.

I’m sure I have not posted anything on this topic yet, but I if I did, my bad.

So I have a huge fascinations with airports. They are always so big, spacious and pretty. The architectural designs of the airports are always so beautiful, everyone is different in their contemporary style. The atmosphere there is also very clean and endless. If feels like I can go on and on in there, the possibility of where you can go are endless. The other reason I love airports is because of what happens there. You either go to an airport to head off to an adventure, or your are there welcoming a friend or family member into your country. I’ve always seen smiles at the airport, except for those who are extremely jet leg.

Oh and airports almost always have attractive foreign guys.

You are very [insert compliment here]

I should be dead asleep right now, but I don’t feel like it yet. Maybe after this.

I do get jealous when people get nice compliments that just boost up someones day or their confidence. Not I’m not saying that they shouldn’t get it, but I would be nice if I get something nice and unexpected once in while. Something from someone different, that way I would know that you’re not just saying because you are my friend and that you are obligated to say such thing. Something nice that I might not have known that someone thought that about me. I’m always so down on myself so it would be nice to hear something like that. A change. This may link to the last posting. Something out of the ordinary that would happen that would put a smile to my face because it is just that nice. Being flattered is nice though a lot may not be the best. I can’t remember when the last time I got an unexpected flatter attack from anyone. Especially from the opposite sex. Maybe this is just about attention from guys? I don’t get much. I’m always just the girl in class or someone they see. Sigh. When will it change?

Again and again and again.

Everyday is the same for me. I’m basically reliving each day over and over. Every weekday, I wake up, school, home, homework, maybe gym sleep. Weekends, wake up, morning routines, gym, home, do nothing.

It is so bland. There is never anything new. I fell pathetic as my friends tell me about their exciting life, talking to interesting people, doing something different something that is not within my day’s schedule. I never have any stories to correspond to the stories that is told to me about someone’s life. I’m always the listener. Awe-ing at the juicyness of people’s day.

Is it sad that the only new stuff that occurs during my day is seeing something new on the internet (eg. youtube, movie) ?

I talk to the same people everyday, I see the same people everyday. I don’t even know when was the last time I have met someone new that is the least bit interesting to spice up my day. I wake up everyday thinking ‘Another day, I hope something out of the ordinary happens.’ I don’t try to expect much, maybe just being able to talk to someone new, see something that is worth remembering.

I get upset when I even think about it. Another point that tags along the lines about my life being boring and dull. All the time I leave my phone somewhere, decide not to touch for maybe half the day in hopes of new notifications. Maybe someone decides to text me out of the ordinary. Maybe someone thinks I’m important enough to just give me a call to say hi. Finally, I decide to turn over my phone. There is always a state of anxiousness right before. It never follows through. Nothing, nada, just my wallpaper of muscular back with slight sight of butt crack. Sigh. Some people are just so interesting.

My days are so predictable. This is why I love doing something different, going somewhere that isn’t here. To stretch what I’m trying to say, something different for me is like escape from reality. It’s unreal, who would think anything interesting is happening in my life? Oh my.

Paid off.

I never thought that I can ever end up receiving money from doing well in school. I actually never gave the idea of scholarships any thought. I know my marks are not enough to get me any decent scholarships. My marks are mid-low eighties at the moment, definetly not enough to get me a thousand dollar scholarship. Oh well.

Any who, today I received $125 from doing well in school. That is a first and may probably be my last. I’m not being a pessimistic, I’m being a realist. I was actually really excited the whole time leading up to the event. Yes I’ve been there before, but for the past two years it was for the honour society. I have yet to recieve any concentrated subject awards, nor did I expect it. This just shows that for me, I’m not one to compete with others for awards and such. I don’t try to ‘beat’ people. It is not a competition for me. I do my best and see what happens.

Speaking of competitions. I don’t understand why some people see school as a competition against everyone else that is in it. Maybe that is the way you motivate yourself, but some people take it too extremely. I feel hurt and dumbed down when people see my mark, people that are usually let’s say ‘ the smart kids’ and either celebrate from the fact that they are beating me, or say something like ‘how the hack are you getting a higher mark than me?’ Um sweet? Keep your competing mindset to yourself ok

Never one but plenty.

I always try to be the one that is a little off. By this I mean, I hate being able to fit perfectly into a stereotype, there for I strive for something different while maintaining in the stereotype. I’m a geek that tries to be cool. I’m a stereotypical Asian that tries to be a slight rebel. I’m a total square that can’t seem to stay away from suggestive comments. You see what I mean? I can’t just be one thing, I don’t do well that way.

Dead.

There are just some people in your life that you don’t get to choose. They are there, basically set in stone to haunt your life. You can try to ignore their existence, but no matter what they will make it obvious that they are there. I feel nothing for this person and I’m sure this person feels the same towards me. I would not care if this person suddenly drop dead or gets struck by a truck. I’ve tried so hard to make the awful relationship between us work, but no matter how hard I try he always finds a way to fuck up my progress of trying to be nice. People tell me that I don’t really feel this way towards this person and that I would regret all my deathwishes towards if something does happen. I don’t want this person in my life anymore. I’m so close to leaving him behind me forever. I’m sure he would like my out of his life too. After I leave, I feel no need to ever make the effort to talk to him anymore. This creature has been taunting my life for the past 12 years, and so many times where I’ve wished his existence is gone. I want the only thing keeping us in common is our share of blood, nothing else. I’m not going to try to be civilized either when we are grown adults. I will not want to see him anywhere outside of family gatherings. No cups of coffees for us.

I wish death upon you. You’re dead to me.