do you ever get the feeling when you see a movie or listen to a song where it brings you back to a specific time and place. a previous memory that makes you sad that it’s only a memory? some memories are so strong it can really trigger the emotions. i love having those memories because i can remember it so vividly about every single detail and it makes me smile, but then it becomes so vivid that the realization that it is just a memory in my brain is overwhelming.
I’m young and i’m getting these feelings, what would happen when i’m old looking back at my life. time is such a weird thing, the idea of time and space. these are things that you cannot explain in the world we live in. how do you explain time? im not asking what time is, but how does it work? why does it go forward and why is it that that is the only direction it goes in?
Times like this makes me want to live my life to the fullest, but how can i live it to the fullest with limitations in my way. i want to start now, but i’m still ‘under parental supervision’ there isnt much i can do. and after i leave for university, school would occupy my life for the next 8 years atleast. and then after that work would mark the rest of my life. when would i be able to experience everything i want? what i want is to travel and experience the wonders of the world without the stress of people around me. how is that possible when you have responsibilities? i want to be one of those people that travels for a living, but to think that would be very unrealistic.
The closest thing i can actually do to achieve my dream i think is to travel first thing after i get out of university. but to make a reality i must start saving up money, a shit load of money. after i reach my dream i think i would be able to resume life knowing that i have accomplished a life goal.
But now that i think of it, after that is over. it will be all but a memory. everything i do will be all a memory. the good, the bad. the best days of my life, they will end sometime. how about when i ‘end’ will i be a memory? i hope i make enough of an impact in someones life where i will be a memory. what if all those people ‘end’, the people that remember the person i was? the ones that remember my last moments as a person. what will happen to the memory of me then? it’s a scary thought. all this because of time and space continuum. the reason we age, the reason time goes by, the reason for the ‘past’ of which our memories are about.
I have never thought so hard into a subject before, and have it expand so far out.